This week has been a roller coaster of emotional tides.
Now as I wind down,I have put my beloved on an airplane. She is off to be with her parents as they seek to persevere. My father-in-law will be undergoing cancer treatment and surgery.
Jack, I know you as a mentor, father-in-law, and I wish you well. I know, in my heart, that so many years ago you had misgivings about the new son-in-law you had acquired. I have done my best for 19 years now, and I hope I have not let you down.
K. has left on this journey, and she is still my heart and soul and is still my main concern. We understand how special she is and I know how lucky I am to have her and all that she has brought into my life.
That said; I must leave this for the world to see. Of all I have written, this is the best I will ever do. This daughter that you raised has been my boon. What more could a father ask; than that his daughter is so loved. Now as a father, I understand your worries and joys. Thank you for your wisdom and patience. Get well and stay strong.
Know in your heart, that my heart is hers. God bless you and keep you.
For K.
When I was younger I would compare our love,
to the sun with odes;
full of blazing and overwhelming tides of passion.
The years have come and passed us,
and I know.
You are not the sun, not the ocean crashing in,
filling my heart.
You are the moon, full of gentle light
softly invading the darkness of my soul,
bringing a soft luminescence that enlightens me.
Rather than the pounding and surging surf,
you are subtle lake water,
lapping, lapping,
at the shore.
Not the forceful gale to sweep clean the clutter
of my mind.
You are the cool winters breeze,
that brings new warmth to a dying fires embers,
and I glow,
effervescent,
waiting for passion to ignite,
at your touch.
1.13.2008
Closure
What a weekend.
I got off the ferry and stepped back into my world. Fund raisers for Scott. fires in the Flats, and the memorial for Robin.
I am bone weary and heart filled.
The fund raiser for my buddy went well, although I had to miss the majority of it due to a fire out here. Huge kudos to my brothers at Womans Bay fire Dept. for responding as fast as they did. The majority of us were in town for various reasons,but they all dropped what they were doing and responded. It was a long night, but no one got hurt and the abandoned building did not spread to cause further harm.
Today's memorial for Robin Starrett was a fitting tribute to a life lived. The high school auditorium was filled. No, really , it was standing room only. The ceremony was beautiful and sincere. What amazed me most was the travelers that came to speak of their memories of Robin. Every village was represented, my fellow former colleagues flew in from all over the state to memorialize a great man. They read letters from numerous others who could not come to our beloved isle.
Later, at the reception I greeted so many old friends; come together to remember this one man, that I realized how much Robin would have smiled and thought how great it was to see us all catching up with hugs and handshakes. Later at the airport , when the heaviness of our grief was spent, we caught up again, traded stories and addresses. I like to think that; maybe, we will stay closer now.
I wrote this short sometime ago. It was my attempt to verbalize a fathers loss. I feel that it also has meaning to the loss suffered by so many in the past week.
Not Returned
A ball thrown
not returned,
hits the ground
makes a sound
as does earth
hits a grave.
Remember to treat every conversation as it is the last time you would talk to that person.
Peace
Griff
I got off the ferry and stepped back into my world. Fund raisers for Scott. fires in the Flats, and the memorial for Robin.
I am bone weary and heart filled.
The fund raiser for my buddy went well, although I had to miss the majority of it due to a fire out here. Huge kudos to my brothers at Womans Bay fire Dept. for responding as fast as they did. The majority of us were in town for various reasons,but they all dropped what they were doing and responded. It was a long night, but no one got hurt and the abandoned building did not spread to cause further harm.
Today's memorial for Robin Starrett was a fitting tribute to a life lived. The high school auditorium was filled. No, really , it was standing room only. The ceremony was beautiful and sincere. What amazed me most was the travelers that came to speak of their memories of Robin. Every village was represented, my fellow former colleagues flew in from all over the state to memorialize a great man. They read letters from numerous others who could not come to our beloved isle.
Later, at the reception I greeted so many old friends; come together to remember this one man, that I realized how much Robin would have smiled and thought how great it was to see us all catching up with hugs and handshakes. Later at the airport , when the heaviness of our grief was spent, we caught up again, traded stories and addresses. I like to think that; maybe, we will stay closer now.
I wrote this short sometime ago. It was my attempt to verbalize a fathers loss. I feel that it also has meaning to the loss suffered by so many in the past week.
Not Returned
A ball thrown
not returned,
hits the ground
makes a sound
as does earth
hits a grave.
Remember to treat every conversation as it is the last time you would talk to that person.
Peace
Griff
1.11.2008
The road home
Interesting trip.
Last minute call from the guy I was buying my new old truck from. Really, I was getting ready to leave for for A-town and he called because the water pump went just as he was ready to drive in from Willow to meet me. Talk about a leap of faith. I was committed to going over there to pick up the pick-up. I decided to go anyway. Worst case scenario I would catch the Aces game, catch up with my bud and fly home.
Sticking to my tenet of everything happens for a reason I decided to press on. As I pulled into the airport Jess called me to let me know he got a tow and the shop could get it fixed that day. No problem; back on track.
He met me at the airport and we proceeded to Wasilla. The mechanics at the shop were very cool. I talked with them; ya know one wrench to another. I told them I had two goals, to make it to the game that night and drive on to Homer in the morning. They hooked me up. They gave the truck a good look over and we fixed a few small things. Instead of running around A-town shopping for all that stuff I couldn't find on the rock, I spent the day in Wasilla getting to know a new friend and chillin' while they got the truck ready for my trip. Great day!
I finally got to A-town, met my buddy at O'Rielly's for a glass or two of half n' half's' then on to the game. Life was good.
The drive to Homer was full of challenges thanks to my misdirection and the weather. Needless to say I ended up in Seward for a cup of coffee and the humbling experience of seeking directions to the turn I missed. No big, turns out I missed the majority of the storm that hit the peninsula on my little detour. I only dealt with about 50 miles of whiteouts while others fared far worse.
It was a small crowd on the Tusty but what a group! I had a great trip. I met several great fellow Alaskans, had a great breakfast and incredible conversations.
This entry is already to long so I will thank, Paul, Brad, Wyatt, Jason, and Dan for helping me pass the time. I had fun and learned a lot. Where else would I ever meet fellow firefighters and duck hunters, a colleague in my professional world, and lastly a man who moved to Kodiak the year I was born. We talked hunting, fishing, politics, and history. We also just BS'd.
My darling bride had misgivings when I boarded that plane Wednesday, I smiled and put my faith in the greater good. She in turn trusted my judgment and wished me well.
Maybe after all the events of last weekend, I needed confirmation of my beliefs. Everything happens for a reason; if you trust in the inherent good of man, then you will experience the best in people.
This is true.
Thanks to the folks I met on this trip, I have confirmed my belief that all of man is inherently good, trustworthy, and honest. I will not let the exceptions to that rule discount all the good that is out here. Because really, those that follow the good path seldom make the news. It is the exceptions to our common sense of good and bad that do.
They do not deserve the notoriety they get. It is the folks that just get the job done; overcoming the day to day challenge that life. friends, family, and faith bring, that deserve the notice. Maybe they do not want it, (I know I don't), but it serves us all as proof that we can fight the good fight, and remain unwavering, and resolute in knowing one thing.
The right thing is not always the easiest thing to do, it is not always the popular thing to do; but it is always the right thing to do.
I have ranted long enough.
Good Night
Thanks to Ishmael & Chris for reading.
Peace
Griff
Last minute call from the guy I was buying my new old truck from. Really, I was getting ready to leave for for A-town and he called because the water pump went just as he was ready to drive in from Willow to meet me. Talk about a leap of faith. I was committed to going over there to pick up the pick-up. I decided to go anyway. Worst case scenario I would catch the Aces game, catch up with my bud and fly home.
Sticking to my tenet of everything happens for a reason I decided to press on. As I pulled into the airport Jess called me to let me know he got a tow and the shop could get it fixed that day. No problem; back on track.
He met me at the airport and we proceeded to Wasilla. The mechanics at the shop were very cool. I talked with them; ya know one wrench to another. I told them I had two goals, to make it to the game that night and drive on to Homer in the morning. They hooked me up. They gave the truck a good look over and we fixed a few small things. Instead of running around A-town shopping for all that stuff I couldn't find on the rock, I spent the day in Wasilla getting to know a new friend and chillin' while they got the truck ready for my trip. Great day!
I finally got to A-town, met my buddy at O'Rielly's for a glass or two of half n' half's' then on to the game. Life was good.
The drive to Homer was full of challenges thanks to my misdirection and the weather. Needless to say I ended up in Seward for a cup of coffee and the humbling experience of seeking directions to the turn I missed. No big, turns out I missed the majority of the storm that hit the peninsula on my little detour. I only dealt with about 50 miles of whiteouts while others fared far worse.
It was a small crowd on the Tusty but what a group! I had a great trip. I met several great fellow Alaskans, had a great breakfast and incredible conversations.
This entry is already to long so I will thank, Paul, Brad, Wyatt, Jason, and Dan for helping me pass the time. I had fun and learned a lot. Where else would I ever meet fellow firefighters and duck hunters, a colleague in my professional world, and lastly a man who moved to Kodiak the year I was born. We talked hunting, fishing, politics, and history. We also just BS'd.
My darling bride had misgivings when I boarded that plane Wednesday, I smiled and put my faith in the greater good. She in turn trusted my judgment and wished me well.
Maybe after all the events of last weekend, I needed confirmation of my beliefs. Everything happens for a reason; if you trust in the inherent good of man, then you will experience the best in people.
This is true.
Thanks to the folks I met on this trip, I have confirmed my belief that all of man is inherently good, trustworthy, and honest. I will not let the exceptions to that rule discount all the good that is out here. Because really, those that follow the good path seldom make the news. It is the exceptions to our common sense of good and bad that do.
They do not deserve the notoriety they get. It is the folks that just get the job done; overcoming the day to day challenge that life. friends, family, and faith bring, that deserve the notice. Maybe they do not want it, (I know I don't), but it serves us all as proof that we can fight the good fight, and remain unwavering, and resolute in knowing one thing.
The right thing is not always the easiest thing to do, it is not always the popular thing to do; but it is always the right thing to do.
I have ranted long enough.
Good Night
Thanks to Ishmael & Chris for reading.
Peace
Griff
1.08.2008
Time to go
I appreciate the positive feed back I am receiving about my fledgling blog.
I am leaving in the morning to pick up my new old pick-up in Wasilla.
Hopefully this will be an uneventful journey filled with time visiting old friends while I am town.
After I wrap up the business part of the trip, I intend to catch up with my old friend in the big city of A-Town.
The Aces are in town and we will probably spend the night there, catching up, whooping it up, and putting the ghosts to bed.
Events as of late lend promise to a road trip. Let the highway clear my brain and exercise the demons. Because for me, the loss of a brother is painful enough, but it always raises the ghosts of the brothers gone ahead; sort of like salt in the wound, I guess. But that is my problem, my journey. Too many gone too soon. We all have our demons.
I will hold to the good memories, and tomorrow night I will celebrate the lives that were lived, rather than the loss.
The next morning the long drive to Homer will give me time to clean my soul, one more time. A quiet ferry ride will allow me to compose and contemplate. Refreshed, I will return to this beloved island and greet the day.
Vikings we were then, and vikings the remainder will be.
Good night Robin, Dave, Tim, Debbie, Kim , Corey, Dwayne, Ken, James, and Floyd.
Peace.
G.
I am leaving in the morning to pick up my new old pick-up in Wasilla.
Hopefully this will be an uneventful journey filled with time visiting old friends while I am town.
After I wrap up the business part of the trip, I intend to catch up with my old friend in the big city of A-Town.
The Aces are in town and we will probably spend the night there, catching up, whooping it up, and putting the ghosts to bed.
Events as of late lend promise to a road trip. Let the highway clear my brain and exercise the demons. Because for me, the loss of a brother is painful enough, but it always raises the ghosts of the brothers gone ahead; sort of like salt in the wound, I guess. But that is my problem, my journey. Too many gone too soon. We all have our demons.
I will hold to the good memories, and tomorrow night I will celebrate the lives that were lived, rather than the loss.
The next morning the long drive to Homer will give me time to clean my soul, one more time. A quiet ferry ride will allow me to compose and contemplate. Refreshed, I will return to this beloved island and greet the day.
Vikings we were then, and vikings the remainder will be.
Good night Robin, Dave, Tim, Debbie, Kim , Corey, Dwayne, Ken, James, and Floyd.
Peace.
G.
1.06.2008
Winter is a time of dying
At least that is what grandmother always told me.
Today I understand once again what she meant. Shortly after my last post, as I was getting ready for my adventure, fate and the good Lord intervened.
My darling bride whipped open the garage door to tell me the beeper had gone off and they were requesting the WBVFD to report to the C.G. firehouse for the crash. Dropping everything I ran to the fire hall to grab gear, colleagues , and the engine.
But enough of my adventure. I can tell you all about the workings of emergency response later, (if you want).
A friend of mine was driving that plane. A former professional colleague, fellow retired Coastie, and a brother who chose to stay on our beloved island to pursue his dream.
Robin was one of the best sticks I knew. He devoted a major part of his life to answering the bell and pulling people out of the water. I had the pleasure of being on the back-up c-130 crew that watched over his helo as he went out into the goo more than a few times. Ironic; after all the years of doing the heroic work he did, it was a milk run that took him from us.
I would go on, but I cannot. Suffice to say, I will miss our conversations in the various parking lots about town. You know the ones; how ya been, whats new, did ya hear about?; and finally lets get together when things slow down.
Well things never seem to slow down, do they?
Peace and love to the families of those that did not make it. Peace and love to the survivors and their families.
Peace and love to you Judy.
Our former colleagues have started the email trail already. He will be missed and mourned. Another of my former brothers-in-arms has beaten me to the gates of heaven.
Another thing Grandmother taught us.
Every time you see or talk to your friends, treat them as if it is the last time you will see them.
Too true.
God hold and keep you.
Good night Robin
Today I understand once again what she meant. Shortly after my last post, as I was getting ready for my adventure, fate and the good Lord intervened.
My darling bride whipped open the garage door to tell me the beeper had gone off and they were requesting the WBVFD to report to the C.G. firehouse for the crash. Dropping everything I ran to the fire hall to grab gear, colleagues , and the engine.
But enough of my adventure. I can tell you all about the workings of emergency response later, (if you want).
A friend of mine was driving that plane. A former professional colleague, fellow retired Coastie, and a brother who chose to stay on our beloved island to pursue his dream.
Robin was one of the best sticks I knew. He devoted a major part of his life to answering the bell and pulling people out of the water. I had the pleasure of being on the back-up c-130 crew that watched over his helo as he went out into the goo more than a few times. Ironic; after all the years of doing the heroic work he did, it was a milk run that took him from us.
I would go on, but I cannot. Suffice to say, I will miss our conversations in the various parking lots about town. You know the ones; how ya been, whats new, did ya hear about?; and finally lets get together when things slow down.
Well things never seem to slow down, do they?
Peace and love to the families of those that did not make it. Peace and love to the survivors and their families.
Peace and love to you Judy.
Our former colleagues have started the email trail already. He will be missed and mourned. Another of my former brothers-in-arms has beaten me to the gates of heaven.
Another thing Grandmother taught us.
Every time you see or talk to your friends, treat them as if it is the last time you will see them.
Too true.
God hold and keep you.
Good night Robin
1.05.2008
Winter Wonderland
WOW!!
Do you love this weather or what ? Whoever says the flats ain't pretty in the winter hasn't been out here after a fresh snow. I am going to strap on the snow shoes, grab a dog or two and venture out for adventure. I hope a bunch of folks are doing the same thing.
I am hoping more folks are starting to check out my little blog, if you are leave me a comment! I love feedback.
Thought for today is GET OUTSIDE!!!!!
SeeeeYa!
G.
p.s.
For my bud Daytona Karl,
Don't worry, I am fine just more of who I always was.
We have laid the last of the #10 cans of peaches in the basement and my perimeter is mostly secure, but I need to finish it in the spring. Keep an eye on CNN, ya never know what you might see.......
Do you love this weather or what ? Whoever says the flats ain't pretty in the winter hasn't been out here after a fresh snow. I am going to strap on the snow shoes, grab a dog or two and venture out for adventure. I hope a bunch of folks are doing the same thing.
I am hoping more folks are starting to check out my little blog, if you are leave me a comment! I love feedback.
Thought for today is GET OUTSIDE!!!!!
SeeeeYa!
G.
p.s.
For my bud Daytona Karl,
Don't worry, I am fine just more of who I always was.
We have laid the last of the #10 cans of peaches in the basement and my perimeter is mostly secure, but I need to finish it in the spring. Keep an eye on CNN, ya never know what you might see.......
1.02.2008
Happy New Year ?
Well; it's the second of January.
What have you done ? The gyms are full and weight watchers is experiencing it's usual new new membership boon, But really, what have we done?
Do you have a plan to make a positive impact on the neighborhood in which you live?
I love the community in which I am fortunate to live, but it has it's problems. I know that I cannot fix everything, but maybe I can help fix one thing.I cannot sit idle while a thing needs fixin'.
So I encourage everyone of you, (I think I am up to 2 readers now, so please spread this message).
Take the wheel! Empower yourself and enable change. It might seem altruistic, but I believe that there are very few things that we. as citizens of this great community,and country cannot solve if we put our efforts into actions.
New thought:
My buddy is home safe from his adventures in Antarctica. Kenny; God bless and fair winds on your last trip to Asia and the fulfillment of your quest. I am blessed for knowing you. I know that soon we will get together, kill some fish, and relax by the barbecue while you tell me more of your trips.
Ishmael, thank you for reading. I enjoy your blog immensely. What's up with Sandinyourface? I have appreciated Nick's diatribes for several years, but when I tried to respond to his blog, I was unable.
Fair enough to spout your opinions and observations, but ya gotta leave an avenue for response.
I am close to rambling, so I will say good night and leave ya'll with one question. Is this place any better because I woke up today and did one thing ?
Remember; it does not need to be monumental, even helping someone at the airport with their luggage makes a difference.
Peace,
Griff
What have you done ? The gyms are full and weight watchers is experiencing it's usual new new membership boon, But really, what have we done?
Do you have a plan to make a positive impact on the neighborhood in which you live?
I love the community in which I am fortunate to live, but it has it's problems. I know that I cannot fix everything, but maybe I can help fix one thing.I cannot sit idle while a thing needs fixin'.
So I encourage everyone of you, (I think I am up to 2 readers now, so please spread this message).
Take the wheel! Empower yourself and enable change. It might seem altruistic, but I believe that there are very few things that we. as citizens of this great community,and country cannot solve if we put our efforts into actions.
New thought:
My buddy is home safe from his adventures in Antarctica. Kenny; God bless and fair winds on your last trip to Asia and the fulfillment of your quest. I am blessed for knowing you. I know that soon we will get together, kill some fish, and relax by the barbecue while you tell me more of your trips.
Ishmael, thank you for reading. I enjoy your blog immensely. What's up with Sandinyourface? I have appreciated Nick's diatribes for several years, but when I tried to respond to his blog, I was unable.
Fair enough to spout your opinions and observations, but ya gotta leave an avenue for response.
I am close to rambling, so I will say good night and leave ya'll with one question. Is this place any better because I woke up today and did one thing ?
Remember; it does not need to be monumental, even helping someone at the airport with their luggage makes a difference.
Peace,
Griff
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